T O P
mmmeba

The dolls hair is really weird.


strangestdreamm

she has an undercut


wi5hbone

^more ^like ^crip ^cut


lookathatsmug---

...and an overbite


Spec187

r/justfuckmyshitup


BlackMentis

Pretty sure the doll is a Lola Bunny doll (Looney Tunes) Edit: They're ears lol


Yasukablyat

Danny Devito hair


GamerY7

Could have been a gift to sister


Kajkia

On that faithful night, little Sarah became a woman.


SarahPallorMortis

I actually did get yelled at by my dad for kissing my life size Barbie on the mouth. It was about the same height. This was the mid 90’s


__red__5

Her didn't want Barbie cheating on him?


SarahPallorMortis

Lol what? Naw he just didn’t want me to be gay


Supernova141

Well? Are you gay now?


SarahPallorMortis

I’m bi if that counts. I hadn’t had any crush other than Johnny bravo at the time tho


admiralbreastmilk

Hi Sarah


moistpup

Weird.


RadicalRen

Me too actually. But my name isn’t Sarah so it doesn’t count.


SarahPallorMortis

Was it cause they worried about you being gay? I was only like 5


RadicalRen

I was about 5 too. I didn’t get caught though, but I’m sure my religious muslim parents would have been angry.


SarahPallorMortis

Craziness. It’s so not sexual at that age.


godinmarbleform

When a comment comes alive


SarahPallorMortis

My life is one big embarrassing moment after another lol


QuietPace9

And a lesbian with a plastic surgery addiction


tnuke1

That's probably the case lol everyone here is just goofing around and joking


BeastofamaN

I'm not.


QuietPace9

Why not? Its it because your the kid in the pic? Doll dicker!!


garlicnoodle18

Or dad


jonp1

One that can be borrowed on occasion…


1lluminist

The sister or the doll?


liftheveilkisstetank

r/suddenlyincest


NightWolfYT

Yes


Kizik

*Sweet home, Alabama!*


Sifyreel

r/%@


firagabird

r/percentat ?


Sifyreel

It seems nobody here routinely modifies strings with % formatters…


01020304050607080901

Duh, reddit uses markdown for formatting.


NotARealTurtleOk

I feel like everyone is missing which sub this is in. It’s about the use of “faithful” instead of fateful. It doesn’t really matter whether the kid is going to fuck the doll or not.


firagabird

It matters a little


PuzzleheadedWolf6041

can you explain why tho?


NZNoldor

In one case he’s fucking the doll because he believes it to be the right thing to do; in the other case he can’t help fucking the doll since it was fate. Can make a big difference in context, is all I’m saying.


kellzone

Or it was his faith.


NZNoldor

That would be option 1 I mentioned.


PuzzleheadedWolf6041

you explained two different possibilities... but you failed to explain why it matters... which is the only thing that you were asked.


NZNoldor

I wasn’t asked anything, you need to learn some critical reading skills.


Y_I_AM_CHEEZE

I honestly didn't expect to be on this subreddit when you pointed that at.


QuietPace9

Ah! who cares? its fucking funny anyway :D


NotARealTurtleOk

Why does it matter to you if people care?


redalert825

In Russia...that gift is sister.


Interesting_Mistake

Maybe it is his sister and he’s taking her to a wizard to remove the curse


char_limit_reached

He’s still going to try and fuck it at some point.


Double-0-N00b

Well yeah, but he wants to practice on the doll first


BrowserRecovered

step sister..


Ey3_913

What are you doing step-doll?


Sharpymarkr

Or his own doll


Bineyboi

Yea cuz boys don’t play with dolls. Boys only play with hot wheels!!! /s


myacc488

Indeed, boys generally don't play with dolls, especially dolls like this one.


Bineyboi

You’d be surprised


VectorRaptor

Or, some boys just like playing with dolls without it being sexual.


FalconBond

Wait, I'm confused, how is this a BoneAppleTea?


Futuristick-Reddit

faithful/fateful


FalconBond

Oh, shit, I didn't even notice...


riazrahman

Fuuuck I just realized I've been boneappletea-ing that saying my whole life


toddyk

Same


harrypph

Fateful: having far-reaching and often disastrous consequences or implications. Faithful: remaining loyal and steadfast; true to the facts or the original; those who are faithful to a particular religion or political party. Who says my boy isn't being faithful to his new toy?


10_Virtues

All y’all sexualized the doll, I took it as he was man enough to be seen carrying a doll presumably for his sister.


GalaxyZedZee

this is reddit, the average redditors love to sexualize everything


Omsus

Also Reddit is full of kids. Subreddits for questions have their fair share of: "Dear nonvirgin men or women of Reddit, how did you get to do the sex?" "Is sexing worth it?" "Women/men of Reddit, what makes [a man if asked from women, or a woman if asked from men] attractive to you?" "What are your favorite pick-up lines?"


Seaki09

Naive of you to think those questions are from kids and not 30-year-old virgins (I kid but I'd actually be interested in the demographics for reddit. Does anyone know?)


TomoyoHoshijiro

Some say that Reddit is 90% male pedophiles. Others say that it is a 50/50 split between men and women. All we know is, it's not the STIG.


TheGreatZarquon

But it *is* The Stig's Alabaman Cousin!


solarjamie

I’d say 60% are kids, 39% are pedophiles and the 1% left are simply done with life


EmiliaIsBestWaifu

Which one are you


djclarkyk

Mhm.


Jeffperson_numbah_2

"sexy sexers of reddit what is the sexiest sex you have ever sexed?"


SmokeAbeer

That’s what she said


Duckflies

But this is still Reddit and everybody knows redditors don't have sex, so you are lying!!


CommentsOnOccasion

It makes sense, when you never get any sex yourself you obsess over it everywhere else


KenLinx

This is literally just a fucking joke. Why y’all acting like people are doing some deplorable shit?


steightst8

Tbh I don't think it's that funny and I always am a little disturbed by things like this that sexualize children. Even "for teh lulz"


i-contain-multitudes

Jokes have real world effects. Just because something is supposed to be funny doesn't mean that it doesn't perpetuate a narrative.


KenLinx

?? This is not an exploitative image. What real world effect are you even talking about?


i-contain-multitudes

The kid in this image isn't being exploited. The effects are from the sexualization of kids by commenters. This affects the children in society at large. Repeated exposure to something, in this case, sexualization of children, changes the way your brain processes information. It's harmful.


GalaxyZedZee

\^


mrwiffy

The average redditor or loves to generalize the average redditor.


GalaxyZedZee

\*everyone loves to generalize everyone


BluudLust

The average redditor hasn't met me.


DarkArc76

I took it as he was man enough to survive Black Friday


riazrahman

Ya same, I thought he became a man because of the way he was dad gripping a ton of shopping like a boss


thedarkarmadillo

Are the 10 virtues different techniques to jerk off?


10_Virtues

Virtues as in golden rules to fallow or lessons to learn. So yes.


thedarkarmadillo

Teach me sensai


Roving_Rhythmatist

To be fair, he did pray for that doll. He prayed hard.


Bitter_Mongoose

Well I mean it depends on which faith, tbh.


JectorDelan

Does... does that doll have a side shaved bowl cut with pigtails?!? The fuck is it, "Hillbilly Barbie"??


rawfish71

Fateful I get it, but what the hell, grandma has to know he's gonna hump that thing. Edit: For some of you I must say Whoosh, it's a joke. Lighten up, it's Reddit. And to the guy that called me a sweaty chud, what? You misspelled studly Chad. or maybe you own a sex doll and that's why your offended?


Adesiem

I'm more concerned as to why the doll has a bald spot


BrowserRecovered

ez clean up


Smathers

Yup same reason my gf shaved her head When my family asked her about the style and I said because of the semen we were asked to leave thanksgiving dinner :(


Whoneedstreez

You should have jizzed all over your family.... Then they would understand!


firagabird

Yeah, clearly they're unaware of the hassle of cumhair


B_McD314

Or why it’s a colossal-sized doll


46554B4E4348414453

Furpies haven't been in since the 70s man


Exotic-Yam-1725

Because they couldn’t possibly be buying Christmas presents for someone else…


DangOlRedditMan

No one said that wasn’t a possibility. It’s a joke.


TomoyoHoshijiro

The kid is 9. Depending on the parents he doesn't even know what sex is yet.


pe1uca

It should have been 'frightful' if it was something like terror, right?


stevein3d

[Fateful](https://www.google.com/search?q=fateful&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS685US688&oq=fateful&aqs=chrome..69i57j46i433i512j0i512j0i433i512j0i512l2.2860j1j4&hl=en-US&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8) probably, frightful maybe, but definitely not faithful.


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[удалено]


GlamityJean

Yeah, specially the whole sexdoll fetish, she probably can't even picture it


[deleted]

[удалено]


Brewzky77

What plane ride home? Did this look like an airport…? They’re shopping. Unless they flew their private jet to the local sprawlmart


IamSoooDoneWithThis

Maybe she’s woke AF, you sweaty chud


ricst

He watched a movie and now just hoping Kim Catrell comes out.


FLORI_DUH

Does it defraculate?


jonp1

Exactly! Then it’s a broken defraculator!


nodddingham

Like you would even know dick about fraculation.


McPebbster

*„Alright, sixty for the resonator, and my grandson wants the sex robot.“*


joranth

“Droppin’ loads…. Yeeeah baybeeeee”. “Summer, you might want to cover your eyes…”


boi_flippy

Took me way too long to realize what was wrong here


cbracey4

My sister got a life size Barbie when she was like 8 and it sat in the basement storage because she would have nightmares about it coming to life. Thing was terrifying.


GeekyFreaky94

I've lost fates in humanity.


8Ariadnesthread8

Omg I totally forgot about my size barbie until now!


tsivv

Well he's full of faith it'll work.


do_better_tomorrow

Is that Russia or Poland? Cuz in Russia, the doll fucks YOU!


CrazedEcoCommunist

It's Russia, Polish does not use Cyrillic


do_better_tomorrow

TIL something


Risu_The_Tengu

This reminds me of a few Christmases ago, I hit up Walmart at like 3 am and I didnt have a car. They had this HUGE monster high doll, thing was probably about as tall as the one in the picture. Mind you, I dont own a vehicle, so I walk everywhere...here I am, this heavily tattooed dude walking about 3 miles home in the dead of night hauling this near lifesize doll. Shit was equally humorous as it was mildly embarrassing 😁 I got some big ol dad points that Christmas 😛


cat_vs_laptop

In a thread full of awful comments thank you for this slice of wholesomeness.


Risu_The_Tengu

No Problem 🙂


Dan300up

Fast forward 40 years to his therapy sessions, and this will have been identified as the most pivotal moment of his life.


rawfish71

*Best day of his life.


Its_aTrap

"That's when I realized doc, I'm Lars and the Real Girl"


DorisCrockford

That could be a girl.


Skyrim_For_Everyone

r/arethestraightsok


heyitsmecolku

r/QTWTAIN


lilchalupzen

How tf that related to straight people the grandma is just nuts


Nierninwa

Its a 10ish year old kid with a doll and a ton of people are making sex jokes. The Grandma is not the problem here.


Eqvvi

Because it's not a sexdoll, it's a child's toy... you are sexualizing a child, you are assuming a doll that also looks like a child is made for pedos or for kids to practice. That doesn't sound "OK" to me.


lilchalupzen

How am I sexualizing a child by thinking a doll looks vaguely like a sexdoll bro💀


Eqvvi

You've seen a lot of sexdolls that look like children?.. Also, assuming something sexual the moment you see a child and a doll is the definition of "sexualizing a child".


[deleted]

[удалено]


ElefanteOwl

What's BLT? Surely you're not referring to a Bacon Lettuce Tomato sandwich, but I can't figure out what you meant?


PurpleMyst22

And we're only having a laugh but you took it personally


[deleted]

[удалено]


PurpleMyst22

I literally said nothing and you're feeling attacked


SparxYT

Average r/wallstreetbets user


BenTCinco

Took me by the hand Made me a man


DerWaschbar

Those dolls are so weird. Honestly I don't see what child would want a "life size" doll to play with


GarNuckle

Oh My God I’ve been writing it that way for years!


nosleepincrooklyn

That thing is gonna glow radioactive under a black light


Georgie42_0

It uh… looks cool huh?


SlavPhoenix

All these upvotes are probably from the meme and not the boneappletea


Aggravating-Cup-1728

Or a gay man


Win090949

Maybe it’s a Christmas present and Christmas = Christianity = Religion = Faith


Nostimorto

And that night george became georgette and realized their shell cracked


crazylazykitsune

Call me crazy, but I don't see what's so funny. Why y'all automatically gotta make it weird? Jeez


dospetros

that big dolls looks so weird and also are very popular in russia


RedFlaim

Wow. You can just buy a girlfriend for your kids now? I had to struggle as a kid. *grumbling old man noises*


YEETUSDELETUS6ix9ine

Child's first sex doll


Its_an_ellipses

Im sure he doesn't have many options, I bet he was faithful to monster Barbie...


BlizzPenguin

I am sure he only wanted it as a souvenir, to remember their time together at the store. No other reason.


ProtectionWeird3272

used to play with my cousins barbie doll .


AndreyGamingOP

How is this bone apple tea


Adesiem

The phrase is "fateful night", not faithful


AndreyGamingOP

Oh. Never knew the difference


1lluminist

"O cum all ye faithful..."


the-poopiest-diaper

Not very faithful


pliqtro

Looks like George Costanza with his mom Estelle


Ghostface69uwu

🙏💀


BrainHerpes69

Hopefully the doll will remain faithful to him.


collapsedbook

“Yeah! You know, I mean, it's different from the stuff on earth, and, you know, you take me to all these crazy places across the galaxy, and, you know, I don't really have anything to to remember all those trips by, It'd be kind of cool, like a souvenir, You know, like, what if you passed away or died or something? I wouldn't even have anything to remember all the cool stuff we did, you know?”


WonWolf

Reminds me of that Gazorpazorp episode.


IkonikBoy

I assume the boneappletea is the faithful night bit, but what's the intended sentence


rustys_shackled_ford

I hope Karen is ready for a morty jr.


FailedSociopath

Oh, it looks cool, huh? That's why you want it?


Due_Platypus_3913

It’s just like,a cool souvenir,like,to remember our adventures!


bails0bub

You never know, maybe he will be in a committed relationship with the doll.


Your-In

I have been spelling it like that for the last 17 years....


Wesselton3000

Mayhap he was just trying to recreate his favorite popular battle royal themed Korean Netflix series


dystopicvida

Hey Rick every time we go on an adventure I never get to get anything I'm just saying this one time let me get something


emptydesigns

Welcome to the 90s.


MrExusemeQDLF

r/formulabuddyretard nooo Georgey boi😭😭😭


ProfMcGonaGirl

Why did this toy company make a 4 foot tall doll? Like all jokes aside, why? Just why? What would little girls actually do with a doll as tall as them????


followmereader

He's going to be faithful to that doll for the rest of his life.


79Freedomreader

He was preying the hole thyme....


_thatguy420

In thought this was correct as well until a couple months ago when I say down and thought about how little sense it makes.


ladycatgirl

What is the correct word though?


Adesiem

It should be "fateful"


ladycatgirl

Ah makes sense


theMOESIAH

Idc if it's wrong, it's still fucking hilarious.


cheseebuger

r/lostredditor